Just Maybe……

I’ve talked a lot about waiting on God’s timing, but the past few weeks that has turned into action.

Currently, my house is on the market for sale at a reasonable price.  It seems reasonable to sell the house because I only have a small amount of income coming.

Just maybe though, God wants me to keep the house.  Just maybe he has a greater plan for the house.  Maybe there is a reason there hasn’t been a single offer on the house.

I don’t understand all of God’s ways.  But I can follow a principle that says, And my God will meet all your needs according to the riches of his glory in Christ Jesus (Phillipians 4:19)

Maybe God will honor the volunteering and interning at my local church.  Maybe God has me right where He wants me.  To be totally dependent on Him to supply my needs. It’s scary at times, but it’s the best race I have ever. And I cannot wait to reap the rewards for being obedient to an Almighty God.

When God Asks Us to Do the Unreasonable

Why is it that God asks us to do the unreasonable? I believe the answer to that question is to further our personal relationship with Jesus Christ.  If God did not have challenging moments in out lives, where would our dependence be.  The answer would be on ourselves.  We would be tooting out own horn saying things like:

“I got this one”

“I don’t need God for this challenge”

“I don’t need God in my life at all”

God can also asks us to do the unreasonable to test our faith level.  If you asked God to bring in the man/woman of your life into your life, and He does. Your faith would increase.  But what if God doesn’t bring you that significant other,  Do you pout and scream and say, “where is God? I thought God loved me. Some God this is.” May I make a suggestion.  God heard your prayer the very first time and is already aligning the pieces into place.  You just need to have a little patience!

The unreasonable often seems unreasonable because it goes against our culture.  We live in a culture of not only if we want it now, we can have it now. Advertisements flood the papers and airwaves convincing you that you are not good enough unless if you buy this $100 facial cream that guarantees to make you look longer.

How can a believer stop these attacks from the enemy, The first thing is to get into the Word of God and see how Almighty God sees you. Next, surround yourself with other believers that are wanting to walk the Christian life.  Lastly, I will post 30 Life Principles from Dr. Charles Stanley, that is beginning to take root within my mind.

Have a blessed night!

Grace and Peace,

Marc Kutylowski

Waiting on God….Whatever the Cost

Have you ever found yourself in a situation wondering if you should act now or wait? More than likely you have. And more than likely, you wanted it now.  How many times has God warned you about getting ahead of God’s timing?

Timing is everything with God.  It is important to not get ahead of his timing, but also not to get behind in his timing.  If you are out of God’s timing, there is probably a sense of restlessness in your spirit.  God has a plan for your life and if you are out of his timing, you may just miss the best that God has for your life.

While timing is important with God, the sacrifice you may have to make is equally.  Take something like tithing for example.  How often has God wrestled with your heart to give 10% back to him.  It isn’t to punish you or to make you suffer.  But it is to show God that you recognize that God will “supply all of your needs according to His riches and glory.”

And remember God’s plan often isn’t often reasonable. It may just send you around the country so that God can teach you a lesson, that there are trustworthy people here on this planet.

The best way to stay connected with God is through prayer. And not after the traffic jam occurs and you are already running late to work.  God wants to be involved intimately in every aspect of your life.  The question is will you let Him…….whatever the cost may me.

Lessons Learned in Depression, That Couldn’t Be Learned on the Mountaintop

This message“Lessons Learned in Depression, That Couldn’t Be Learned on the Mountaintop”  will be a quick read today.  As I think about this depression over the past 2 years or so, here are some things that I have learned about myself, God, and life.

  1. I matter, I am not bad, I have power, I can do good, I can love, I am worthy, I am joy.
  2. God has a purpose not only for me but for every single believer.
  3. It’s not enough to just to go to church once a week.
  4. When God says to give the first fruits of your work and tithe he doesn’t do that to punish you.  He does it to bless you.
  5. I’ve learned how to pray more effectively to God.
  6. I’ve learned that money isn’t everything.
  7. I’ve learned God isn’t a vengeful God, but a jealous God that is after your heart.
  8. God will move heaven and earth to show you His will.
  9. Relationships are extremely important.
  10. Medical science isn’t always correct.
  11. God’s plan isn’t always reasonable.
  12. God can do a lot with only a little.
  13. Demonic spirits are real.
  14. Fasting can lead to a more intimate relationship with God
  15. God cares more about your heart than you comfort level.
  16. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.
  17. The Book of Proverbs is a great handbook of how to live a Christian life.
  18. The Book of Job teaches us how to walk through a valley experience.
  19. Sourthern Gospel music is awesome 🙂
  20. God can use depression to shape and mold us into the image of His Son.
  21. There is a limit to the darkness.
  22. God can use depression to prepare a person for His will for their life.

may-god-bless-you-my-darling

Waiting Patiently, Expectantly and Prayerfully

Have you ever waited so long for something that you started to lose hope?  You have already seen the signs from God that he will fulfill His promises to you, but still may doubt that it will ever happen.

Let me encourage you that today is not the day to give up. Nor is any day really. God has us wait for many of reasons.  He can have us wait to teach us to totally rely on Him for any circumstance in life.  He can have us wait because He could be doing an awesome work in another person. He could be doing awesome work in you!

God knows the perfect time to release His blessings to you.  It will be a time that will have an awesome impact.  It will be a time that will bring the most glory and honor to God.  God knows when you can handle the blessing and when you can’t.

So while you are patiently waiting for God to bring a promise to pass, let me encourage you to remind God of His promises in prayer.  God loves a humble servant that “Looks to the LORD and his strength; seeks his face always.” (Psalm 105:4).

If you never have trusted Jesus Christ as your personal savior, none of this is available to you.  The good news is that it is a simple process.  Just say “Lord Jesus, come into my heart. I make you my Lord and Savior.”  Then step back and surrender and watch God do an awesome work through you.

P.S. 16 days until Kent State kicks off against Illinois. Go Golden Flashes!!

Spiritual Warfare

Throughout my depression that I have gone through, I never really stopped to think that there might be some kind of spiritual warfare going on in my heart and mind…….that is until this week.

For the past 6 months or so, I’ve developed my personal relationship with Jesus Christ to the point of being able to ask “yes” and “no” questions. If my heart has long slow beats that symbolizes a “yes”, if there is no heartbeat response that symbolizes a “no”.  It has allowed me to make some pretty difficult decisions despite when human reasoning seems more logical.

Well earlier this week I was thrown in for a loop.  I don’t remember what the question was, but I believed the answer was a “yes”.  Next thing I know I am hand-cuffed, sedated and back in a mental health facility. Definitely not the answer I was expecting!!

No worries, God can change any situation around.

As I laid in my bed, I began reading Matthew 17:18-21

And Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of him; and the child was cured from that very hour.

19 Then the disciples came to Jesus privately and said, “Why could we not cast it out?”

20 So Jesus said to them, “Because of your unbelief;[a] for assuredly, I say to you, if you have faith as a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you.21 However, this kind does not go out except by prayer and fasting.

It’s like a felt a nudging from God that I needed to start fasting.  It’s kind of ironic because I always pushed fasting aside as something that only “crazy” people do. I talked to two of the elders from my local church and they explained how I may be going through spiritual warfare from the enemy.

I always find it fascinating how God and bring you right to the correct scripture verse when facing a serious dilemma.

HALT! STOP! ROADBLOCK!

Have you ever had a moment in life that doesn’t make any sense?  I am sure you have as well. You try and rationalize and that just frustrates you even more.

Here is what I have discovered in these confusing and conflicting situations.  God is in the process of lining up the pieces for something awesome to happen.

Take my Electroconvulsive (ECT) Therapy sessions I have been going through.  I am scheduled for 12 sessions and everything was going great until the 11th procedure.  When I woke up I barely knew who I was, who my mom was or even the year.  Everything around me just seemed different and not in a good way.

And the weirdness didn’t stop there.  I became hostile towards people.  Hostile towards my parents.  Hostile under my breath because a church friend was 5 minutes late for coffee.  The main frustration is that I will be starting an internship in a few weeks and I would hate for something like this to get in the way.

Wednesday was not any better.  I became so belligerent that I had my parents call the cops on me.

The officer asked me, “Why don’t you come over here so we can talk?”

My response, “Like Hell!” (Note to self: This is a quick way to get handcuffed and kindly escorted to the back of a cruiser)

The raging didn’t stop at the hospital.  The staff had strap me down to subdue me and give me an injection.

Today is the first day I am having some semblance of a normal day with thoughts and various activities)

Why do I tell you all of this?  The reason that I do is that show that I although I may not know the reason God allowed to behave like this, I have a enough trust and confidence that God is working in my life and churning up the impurities buried deep with in me.  Or Maybe this is God’s way of keeping me in check.

Also, this blog is is to inspire one another when going through difficult moments in life. I refuse to write a bubble gum blog.

Grace and Peace,

Marc Kutylowski

Thank You Everyone!

Over the past week or so, I have been sensing my depression has been lifting and the joy of the Lord I have waited so long for is about to burst through this cocoon that I have been in.  I have been having these weird sensations running throughout my body and head. At times it feels like their is this electricity that is kindling throughout my head.

I’ve always heard the phrase that “Jesus lives in your heart”, but was not able to grasp that concept. Now it feels like there is this opening takening place in my heart. It feels like a fracture that slowy opens and closes. Like something is trying to poke their head out.

It’s hard to put into words, but I just have a sense that something amazing is about to happen in my life. The restoration that I have read so much about, heard about and believed I feel is upon me.

It’s awesome to look back more than two years ago when everything was seemingly going great, but praying to God there must be more to life than what I was experiencing. Little did I know that would send me into the deepest of depressions that resulted in a suicide attempt last year. It’s awesome to be able to accept that that was God’s plan for my life to bring me into His will for my life.

How would I be an effective minister if I didn’t understand the emotional pain that people go through?  How would I be able to provide Godly counsel to people if I was ignorant of God’s ways?  The answer is I wouldn’t be able to.

It’s been amazing how God has protected me and kept me safe while in the valley. I was let go from my job back in May of 2014.  Now for those of you that know me, I always struggled with money. Even if it was spending $2 on a cup of coffee. Not knowing where my next dollar was going to come in was extremely stressful for me.

But you know what? I still have about the same amount of money in my bank account as I did in May of 2014.  Not because of anything that I have done, but its because I now recognize that “My God will supply all of my needs, according to his riches and glory” For a person that worried about a $2 cup of coffee I can’t wait to give tithe (and then some) back to God. It’s just amazing.

As I prepare to start an internship with my local church in the next month, I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you all for helping get to this point. You really are God’s angels. So thank you to Northstar Church, Good Shepard Church and Dr. Charles Stanley and his team at In Touch Ministries. Thank you to Christ Hospital (x2), Bethesda Hospital, Good Samaritan Hospital, Linder Center of Hope (x2) and the Kettering Health Network. Thank you to Skyland Trail in Atlanta, the people of Memphis and my family at First Baptist Atlanta. Thank you to all of my friends and family.  Thank you to the people that walked out of my life because they would of been getting in God’s way.  It means so much to me. Finally, thank you God for not letting me believe the lies of the world. Thank you not letting me believe that I had bipolar disorder, BPD, OCD, and I’m sure a few other ones :). Thank you for letting me only believe that I was only missing the love and joy that you can provide!

God has a plan everyone’s life.  I pray you ask God to show you what it is and step back and let God go to work

I can’t wait to see what God does through me in my life!